When the International financier Thom Hobbes expanded the sales of Traveller’s Shampoo Bar Soap™ to the billions of recently mobile unwashed unwilling to put liquid shampoo in their rucks before setting out across deserts and pampas to labor sweltering in cities his ability to fund a constellation of glistening space orbs advertising Shampoo Bar Soap increased with his billions of rubles. In months Eartha was orbited by encapsulated defense wombs for nurturing the first line of malware defense.
In the midst of 14 feet of solid ice; frozen heavy water, the waveform series of encrypted protocols barely reach the awareness field of the chess baby. Distant galactic patterns were black neutrinos and white photons impressed upon the baby’s brain where implicit grandmaster programs sifted through countless permutations searching for incipient rogue black hat program viruses in the quanta reaching across normal space and even through quantum no-space to infect the planetary systems circuitry of any sentient civilization in the line of communication. In the rotating spherical chess wombs brilliant babies destined for abortion were transported and given a home.
The chess babies trained from before birth with a constant stream of consciousness input of all historical chess games interpreting quantum logic reality until they became too old. Extended infantile consciousness perished around age three when the differences between mind as a game for-itself and empirical sensor awareness grew to present conflicting claims to thought. Babies aged beyond the purely computational and intuitive stage found it difficult to think solely to meet the extended reality where alien civilizations sending holistic malware across the Universe could be encountered. Alien malware could be encoded within the full spectrum of physical electromagnetic waveforms. Baby’s brains needed to be adaptable without distraction by empirical concerns to meet any possible threats..
Sentient civilizations taking global A.I. systems with malware drew invaders to the new home even as machinery was converted to conform the world to alien design suitable for predators. The chess babies fought the takeover existing as coefficient of adversity to subdue in return for the conditioned response of nurturing game-piece love. Chess babies defended the Earth from alienware viruses until retirement to conventional human chess training around the age of four on the planet Eartha, in particular.
Hal the chess baby top I.Q. gun was elected most popular chess baby gunner by the computer network audience that carefully monitored his work knocking down alien viruses. Thus his transition to Moscba Chess Home for retired chess baby swag was easy enough; his many fans brought product endorsement opportunities and his likes continued to increase over the years that he lived in a sensory deprivation tank with nothing input to his electrodes besides chess games, chess theory and Youtube videos. When Hal reached the ripe old age of 18 his millions of fans insisted he take control of the Presidency of the World Chess Federation of Free Interesting Persons. He stood for election and upon taking office made his second retirement from chess having achieved a F.I.D.O. chess rating of 4000 surpassing by 1000 points the previous record holder Sicilia Gambit’s 2997 high mark.
From the WCFIP presidency to taking the Presidency of the Disunited States was just a matter of waiting for Hal. He still needed to wait until age 34 to be elected to make an imprint upon history on a larger scale. He would have live video trick streams of his work. Goading the newest social order into behavioral Utopian reconstruction was just a matter of chess. Through the darkest hours of the soul anyone could think of chess openings and know that once they were to start the game would be finished one way or another. Mankind need to learn not to cheat. It would be possible to overcome the impossible. Chess baby felt his sense of destiny and knew the Lord was providential for all; the good , the bad and the ugly. Hal would kiss even the ugly among his adoring fans.
In his years of chess and Youtube training immersed in a sensory deprivation tank Hal learned the principles of good government that would keep civilization from dying. A balanced budget, living within one’s means, traditional moral norms without slippage into the dark side of the force, maintaining public infrastructure, quality mass public education, secure borders, adequate taxation on the rich, civil rights for individuals with equal protection of law; these principles were constant requisites akin to operating systems parameters required for human health. Too high of blood pressure, too little food or too much, excess high or low temperatures, etc-such fundamental principles that continued too much time bring sickness and death. In the course of human civilizations that fell exceeded or failed to continue within the healthy political habitation boundaries. Yet Hal found they also perished from aggressive war, too great of territorial expansion and most notably, invasive species. In Hal’s life the malware of invasive species had never stopped assault upon Eartha’s computational artificial intelligence networks. The defense of Eartha A.I. systems from alien takeover was Hal’s primary reason for seeking the leadership of the survivors of the temporary collapse of Eartha’s ecosphere as President of the Disunited States.
Thomas Hobbes’ financial success with biodegradable shampoo bar soap so gentle on hair enabled him to bring an end to the murder of the unborn-a savage, primitive procedure developed in the United States that enabled women to flush their responsible for pregnancy and moral integrity along with their conscience. Thom Hobbes agreed with Watson-‘Quamdiu vivet crescit; life is never done growing‘ .Hobbes’s love for the female gender motivated his quest for a medical procedure to exfiltrate unwanted fetuses instead of murdering them with barbaric osterization or suction. He was successful in the enterprise.
Hobbes found a pioneering surgical inventor that created an efficient way of exfiltrating a fetus and relocating it to a micro-microbiological storage vessel. His appeal to women to give up the barbaric, unconscionable slaughter of the innocents was made easier with evidence that the unborn could be made to learn chess-and much more with in utero signaling input. To murder thinking beings-even physically humble beings-made even the heartless think twice about killing someone that was somewhat of a sentient peer.
Hobbes was able to save hundreds of thousands of unborn humans in his cryo-containers sent to a long-term cryo-storage facility deep in a lunar crater with a constant near absolute zero temperature where they would wait to repopulate Eartha or a comparable human-friendly environment if the unthinkable disaster of complete eco-collapse decimated the world. Occasionally there were couples seeking children of their own that were given permission to adopt a fetus.
Hal had been the prototype for fetal chess instruction, and was the first to be placed in an Eartha orbiting defense pod. His infantile mind was able to discern regular from anomalous synthetic waveform arrivals and sort through possible attacks upon the world’s computational architecture with the objective immunity of pure bioware for-itself and for-others.