Some Worry About Australian War and Russian Collusion

There are people concerned about the willingness of President Trump to send troops to Australia. What cause could drive the leader of the free world to put the military at risk?

The Australian problem could be one of the more challenging concerns of Pentagon theorists. If the Kangaroo population were to become infested with alien extra-terrestrials not signed off on U.N. anti-global-warming protocols, military intervention might be required to safeguard the security of the world.

Kangaroos possessed by the eye of the devil could randomize hopping about the countryside without regard to protocols and sensibilities of ordinary mortals not blessed with Democrat Party Russia-collusion detecting powers. Synchronized ‘roo hopping could generate patterns of communication visible only from space. Invisible orbiting alien quantum crystal quanta-ftl quantum communication relays could interpret and send the patterns in beautiful digital binary code to the extra-galactic controllers just before defense communication satellites overlook a decline of special defense fisheries and crash down to Earth in one tremendous cataclysmic vortex of fire and fury.

A decision to send drone capture-aircraft over Australian deserts and ‘roo capture submarine landing snare-craft to capture fugitive hoppers could be heart rending for those that love shrimp and a cold one, yet with fortitude and hindsight the drones could overcome the true grit of sand that wrenches the works of good-government all-around.

Select special forces units might be conflicted and torn between their loyalty to President Trump and loyalty to radical environmental policies that command the attention of ‘kang partisans following the bouncing ball of co-religionist hoppers. Nothing can be done about that except to weed out those that put Kangaroos before country and send them to Antarctica to guard penguins.