Why the Chess Cheating?

There was sadly, a GM recently that was caught cheating at chess. I am not at all confident that cheating would be of any value to me on-line especially. I think there is a coefficient of slowness on the baud rate or transmission speed such that if I start a game with x milliseconds delay it will be 3x before the game is over. That aside, I don’t really know tablebase too well and reading the notation about suggested lines from SF wouldn’t be much help either because it takes too long to decipher and when the opponent makes a different move that would throw everything all akimbo.

Why does sitting on the composting toilet and looking once at SF help a GM? I can understand that if it was a live following of move by move and a cheater played the best move that would help, unless playing against alpha zero.

With a beard or a bun one could hide a small receiver that quickly whispers the best move found by an accomplice on a computer. Alternatively dedicated cheaters could have a cochlear implant with a radio in it with some adjustable freq the accomplished engine could through-put. Maybe top-level chess player’s matches should have a bio-radio-hazard level 4 screening (like the Andromeda Strain) before admission to the table to reduce skepticism about the veracity of the games. With so much trouble and expense cheating one should need, I think, to earn a lot from the cheating.